Wednesday, September 16, 2009


I will be going away for a while.
I haven't decided when or for how long.
It's not a vacation, a business trip, or a family retreat
Release report. Nah scratch that.
Well regardless of the title of my affairs,
I will be back soon. One day soon.
And no shit I am not sick
I am not dying
For I am already dead inside
Apart of me.
This is a trip of resuscitation.
Yes, many are trained in CPR
I understand that you may be able and even more willing.
However, I am too far gone for those techniques.
I need those electrical hands strapped over me.
I have been in cardiac arrest for sometime now.
Nothing a little passion, love ,and science can't heal.
Unless it's just my time. vacation time.
Aint this some bullshit.
The doctor tells me, the surgeon is on stand by.
Recommendations of possible open heart needed to heal holes left by silence and separation.
Attempts at my life while trying to heal my soul.
With no fucking insurance, I am trapped.
Clogged arteries, full of ease, daily routine, but no literary relief.
Doctor's fee charged to knowledge and growth I guess.
Hopefully the bill collectors get the memo.
That's always plan B.
But for now, I prefer internal retreat.
Cleansing meant for only me.
My ink will be resuscitated.
At dawn!
More morphine please.


I loves to be among light and observe darkness, life is learning to be stuck w in (surrounded by ) darkness and admiring light enough to change settings....

Setting boundaries, trying not to cross invisible lines, where the light shines only momentarily...darkness makes you appreciate the qualities of light... Yet what if it shines too bright...blurring visions, so one would rather love in the dark... and feel it

…The illusion is born in shadows that smile, warming cold souls luke, side effects come from too much light beyond the scope of others. Love in the dark can never be complete, having fallen during day on concrete that called my name in my sleep, how could it be justified to not be, it’s a constant relief. Lights out would simply minimize the opportunities .Among brightness you are able to notice things that have gone foreseen...

Yet seeing is not always believing, light creates shadows and they produce illusions...noticing only the fragments of one’s self... So maybe it has nothing to do with lights or being in the dark...simply with how one chooses to be seen. So I'll being a flashlight…

A flashlight. Controlled by self limitations... Beaming when thought decides, and time permits, but what about when I run out of batteries?

Umm that's when I flip on the lights